Mother Mushroom

My first real experience with this fantasy last Friday night.
I found it to be quite similar to LSD, similar hallucinations, ego loss, uncontrolable giggling at nothing.
What I missed was when the mushroom started speaking to me, she opened up some knowledge, and I rejected it because I was too consumed with rolling over and dying. Really sucked.
The first dose (4 caps, not sure how many were in each) was all fun and laughter, literally, even driving was cool, as my depth of perception was completely out of whack. Driving on long, suddenly incredibly short and scary roads proved to be less of a challange to my awesome skills..
Anyways, after harrasing the fellas at the local maccas for a cup of water and a caramel slice, and much other obscenities made whilst walking around the suburb, we made it back to the house, where some of us had already lost our minds in some kind of individual manic journey. I too fell victim..

With LSD, I have gone through 3 stages, the first part is the uprising anxious vibes I get, but I feel fine. Next is the complete humour of how idiotic my ego is, then the last stage, if I manage to really see it for how it is, I can come to a rest with it, and learn so many facts and new ideas, random bits of knowledge for myself. I only went to this third stage once before, because I was with someone I knew I could trust, I don't trust most of my friends because they are very much used to just "turning away" from anything that seems incredibly new to their inner selves. In turn, I have done lsd once more after that occasion, inwhich I didn't even make it to the second step. I have realised if I want to be taking Hallucinogenics, I shouldn't be doing it with a bunch of morons.
So this is what happened with the Mushrooms, I passed stage 2, but I wasn't able to get into stqage 3, everything seemed so horrible, so evil, that my mind just didn't want to except it. I fled the house back to my own home, which was probably the most unwise decision I have ever made. I tried to wait it out, it was incredibly painful, many voices came to me and told me how wrong I was about everything, that everything I was learning was against my own ego, and that I should stick with that instead of being, the clash was horrible, I had only ingested another 4 caps 4 hours earlier, and it was roughly 9pm when the first 4 were ingested, the second 4 about 2 am. It was now anywhere around 4 to 6 am. I felt the walls box in around my head, everything inside me was against me, I thought I was going to die, I lost my motor control to absolute idiocy, wandering around the house looking for invisible objects to sooth my pain. In the end I just laid there with the evil, So many times I considered calling someone, anyone, but I decided not to, that I would be fine soon.
I began to hear a deadly tone as I lay, with the box around my brain. It was filling my entire skull, as if my thoughts were just too fast for me and I was blocking them all off, one by one, every thought per milisecond I had was crashed into the one before it, and the sound of those thoughts crashing, evil.
I hallucinated myself into some kind of hell, black blotches and bad spheres of doom circled my vision!
luckily, with mushrooms, they only last up to 6 hours, I remember suddenly feeling calm, and managed to sleep for a while.
So, yes I woke up, but not waking up into the 3rd stage, ready to share wisdom. no, I was and am still stuck in the second stage, just don't feel as high about it. The experience was fun, and I learnt some valuable knowledge about the way I have been trying to learn things, but again, I didn't trust anyone that I was with, not fully. I hardly trust myself.
Hallucinogenics should only be taken when one wants to gain something for themselves to be taken back into sober reality, not just for the hell of it, because literally, hell will come to those people.
I have had feelings of quietness since, but more sleeplessness, and dreams that have been very, very weird, and quite vivid. This dream I had this morning, I remember waking up while the dream was still active, i could feel my body, but the dream continued in my head, I was concious of the footage being presented to me in my mind.

I believe that dreams are a representation of what the subconcious is doing, the parts of youreself that you aren't concious of. I think that this is why dreamwork can be quite useful when learning about youreself, learning youre dreams is like learning whats going on with youre subconcious, how you truly feel and understand situations.